It almost seems like every show had one of these episodes. Some of you are right now thinking of one or two that have stood out and have lasted the test of time. Some were awful, some were so dramatic during their time on-air that now they have become beyond hysterical. Here are a few of my personal favorites and not so-favorites.
Tonight on a very special Different Stroke’s. I literally could stop writing for this one. This is one of my all time favorites. We all know where to go when you need a bicycle repair. You go to Mr. Wilson’s Bike Shop. In this two part episode entitled “The Bicycle Man,” Arnold and Dudley get befriended by over-friendly Mr. Wilson. Now boys, its perfectly normal to come in the back of the shop and have a grown balding man take pictures of you with no shirt on. Hey take off the pants and I will show you my new bell. Ring, Ring. A serious episode back in the 80’s, but now its just friggin hysterical. I can’t drive by a bike shop without asking myself, “Is Mr. Wilson in that shop?” Creepy. Side note, Different Stroke’s had about nine very special episodes, but they also had Andrew “Dice” Clay, so that balances it out.
Tonight on a very special Facts of Life. There were a few here, but the one I love is the one when Tootie almost becomes a whore. After being denied permission by her parents to join Mrs. Garrett and the three older girls, Tootie runs away to New York to meet up with them. She meets a teenage prostitute in a coffee shop who tries to recruit her into the dark underbelly of prostitution. Ooooooh! She spends the night with the hooker and her pimp, and the hooker with the heart of gold, Julia Robe…Umm, the teenage hooker tries to convince her pimp that Tootie is not a good candidate with this kicker of a line. “She still watches Saturday Morning Cartoons.” Mrs. G and the girls eventually save the day and Tootie and they head back to the safety of Peekskill. Lesson learned. P.S. Joe had a penis.
Tonight on a very special Christmas Episode of Happy Days. Technically not listed as a very special episode, but its special to me. Entitled “Guess Who is Coming to Christmas,” After Joanie asks if she can have some friends over for Christmas dinner, Howard, (Mr. C.) ((RIP)) wants Christmas to be family only. Fonzie is the big man at Arnold’s, giving out gifts to anyone he can find. AAAAAYYY! Potsie invites The Fonz for dinner, but he declines. Shocker. Potsie really, back off. As the episode moves along we discover Fonzie has no plans for Christmas and is in fact all alone. We discover in a very emotional scene, Richie walking in on Fonzie eating a sandwich and a can of food in his garage. Ok shut up, this is where you found a very young fat kid named Frankie eating a sandwich and a can of Chef Boy-R-Dee, crying my fat little eyes out, I mean his little eyes out. Anyway, Richie, being the pushy pest that he always is cannot leave well enough alone and tricks Fonzie into coming over to fix the broken mechanical Santa. Fonzie comes over and stays and enjoys Christmas with the Cunningham’s, his family. Ok WTF, I’m crying, and I have a sandwich. Side note: Why did no one question the apparent alien abduction of older brother Chuck, who went upstairs in an episode and never returned. Side note #2. Fonzie never threw a punch.
Tonight on a very special Family Ties. In this episode, entitled “A, My Name is Alex,” Alex P. Keaton is in a downward spiral after the death of a close friend. Alex decides to seek some therapy to help him cope with his closest and apparently invisible throughout the entire series, Greg. During his therapy session, we the viewer, see well nothing. The screen is black with the exception of Alex, the occasional prop and the voice of Mr. Therapist. The usual seriousness and comedy ensue with APK’s character regressing to a seven year old worrying about Watergate and then normal APK making fun of Mallory…again. This lasted an hour, the last half hour without commercials. A HALF HOUR! We watch Alex interact with all facets of his life, always leading back to a lame money making joke. Even newcomer to the show Sylvester Stallone, I mean uhh Nick, Mallory’s semi-retarded boyfriend tries to teach Alex some useful nuggets about life….Really now. Alex begins to see the light, when lo and behold, young Andy enters the fray and Alex sees a lot of himself in young , innocent Andy. At the end of the hour episode, Alex is on the road to recovery. Wow, wouldn’t that be great when a loved one dies, one hour of drama, jokes about how dumb Mallory is and all problems are solved. And the Emmy goes to Michael J. Fox. Sha-lalalaaaaaaa. On a side-note: Skippy.
Tonight on a very special Saved By The Bell. I have to admit, I did not watch this show when it aired. I saw about 5 minutes of an episode here and there. On a cruise with my wife, we were getting ready to go out and I turned on the TV in our stateroom. It was a SBTB marathon. Three episodes in, I see one of the best very special episodes ever. Let me say that again. BEST EPISODE EVER! In this episode entitled “Jessie’s Song,” Jessie Spano played by Elizabeth Berkley, is under tremendous pressure balancing her schoolwork, midterms and her participation in a singing group put together by Zack. She turns to taking caffeine pills to keep her edge. She quickly becomes addicted to them, she has to be quick about it because it’s a half hour show. After spurning warnings by Slater, Zack tries his luck and we witness sitcom gold. Jessie after being grilled by Zack breaks down and begins singing, very loudly and very badly, “I’m so excited!!!!, I’m so EXCITED… I’m so….(wait for it) scared” OMFG that was hysterical. Side note: Screech has a porno tape, and I don’t. What’s that about?
Now for your TV quote: Hint, its from another Very Special Episode:
“Damn, Damn!! DAMN!!!”
